“High Ball Stepper”…

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~

He’s the High Ball Stepper
In love with Sgt. Pepper…
Going through life, his own way…
His head is hurting every single day…

Bloody, bruised and feeling battered…
And mentally tired, just fucking shattered…
Lost within his own insanity…
Looking for some sanctuary…

Searching for something or someone to believe…
The people he meets, try to deceive…
Each of their lies, he naively swallows…
Prepared to trust them and to follow…
Paraphrasing every word they say…
Enchanted by their magical ways…
Rewarding them, as he begins to obey…

~

Challenge set by @Elaine_Ewertz on twitter

Tweet me your song request to @eyewillnotcry or email eyewillnotcry@hotmail.co.uk

“No one plans to take the path, that brings you lower”…

woman-shadow-angry1

~

She made a decision…
A long time ago…
The repercussions…
She could not know…
Walking away…
Handing over her child…
Because they claimed…
She was too wild…

Couldn’t care for another…
And look after herself…
So she gave him up…
Despite how she felt…
Leaving him broken…
Both lost and alone…
To start his new life…
In a different home…

And she never called…
Or tried to visit…
She tried to build a life…
Without him in it…
But she carried his face…
Every single day…
And felt the shame…
Knew she’d one day pay…

Either on this Earth…
Or burning in Hell…
For her horrid crimes…
And lies she did tell…
But the day came around…
Where he wanted to know…
Everything about her…
Why she had to go…

Demanded to see her…
And speak face to face…
He began to search…
And slowly did trace…
Finally finding her…
Lost, lonely and alone…
Sat by the open fire…
In a mental home…

With eyes full of anger…
And hate in his heart…
He looked at this woman…
Before slowly falling apart…
Holding her so tight…
In his big strong arms…
He quietly promised…
She’d come to no harm…

Making a decision…
He’d never regret…
All that had passed…
He would never forget…
But try to move forward…
As mother and son…
In spite of the fact…
That her mind had gone…

~

Song suggestion by @SupergirlRavage – check her out on Twitter

“Trying to figure who’s right and who’s wrong”…

Del Amitri – Leeds

November. It has been a long time since November. Lots have happened, too much to tell in detail, but one thing was apparent, I was in need of a gig. An escape perhaps, but just a place where things stop. Stresses and strains of work, life, the universe and beyond just stop. Just stop.

The last gig on my Forty for Forty was London to see my musical “God” – Neil Finn. The time that intervened since has been crazy. So much going on and little time to stop and think. On the occasions that time for thinking was granted, my much maligned ability to overthink kicked in.

A two month period where I encountered a first Christmas without dad, the dynamics of Christmas looking out for everyone but myself. A dash back to Bognor and 3 days in what can only be described as “Deaths waiting room” with my old friend.  A work situation that would have tested the most experienced counsellor and psychotherapist, the stresses and strains of other people’s lives and problems.

With so much more besides, add in my own uncanny my ability to inadvertently hurt others, sometimes, the burden is too great. Sometimes spinning plates drop and sometimes the boy escapes, runs. Music has become my escape, live music has become my salvation and this time, at the feet of one of my “Man crushes”, Justin Currie saved me again.

As he has done so often in my life. The voice of Del Amitri, whose songs and words got me through so much angst when I was younger, was in the right place at the right time. Sadly, the one thing I didn’t have, was a ticket. I didn’t buy in the original sale due to cost and thought Twitter would help, but alas, nothing was doing.

So I took a chance and turned up on the night looking for a spare. None to be found, other than a smoke filled ticket tout. It was a sign of desperation, it was truly the act of a needy man, but I dealt with the man and took my place in the queue. Within minutes, the security man shouted that if anyone in the queue had tickets for the balcony, they should move to another line.

In an instant, the amount of people before me more than halved and as luck would have it, I was now 10 people from the front and as the doors opened, I was not only in the venue, but I was front and centre of stage on the barrier. It could not have gone to plan if I had erm, planned it!

So, the usual reminder, at this point, this is not a gig review – there are a couple to be found online, but this is my experience of the night and as you can already tell, a bit of an “oh woe is me” ramble, so with respect, my blog, my rules, feel free to leave now.

Justin Currie had been in Harrogate in September, you can read about that experience here. That night, Justin was in fine form and news was breaking that Del Amitri had reformed. There is a song on Justin’s last solo CD called “Half of Me”, a poignant number that could have / may have been written about this. Half of him happy as he was, but half of him wanting to relive former glories.

However he felt about it, here the band did reform and were back in the same venue I first saw them – it was then called the “Town and Country Club”. That night was a defining moment for me. Seeing Currie saunter onto stage with his trademark sideburns and longish rocker hair. The Band had just followed up the amazing album “Waking Hours” with “Change Everything”. And for me, that did change everything.

I was smitten by him, his vocals, the way he moved on stage with bass in hand. Now I am not a man lover in any way shape or form, but hey, I would consider Justin if I was. A handsome man, he is a presence on stage, he has a natural way with the crowd and he has something I could never have, the ability to write words that connect.

And they connected with me nearly 20 years ago and they still connect with me to this day. In some cases, the songs are more pointed and resonate more now than ever. Perhaps that is due to where I find myself, or perhaps that is simply the mark of a great songwriter, one that somehow keeps songs revealing themselves like a recurring rose in the cold white snow, year after year.

The band were more than ably supported by a duo from Dallas, called the O’s. A combination of banjo, harmonica, guitar and more than helping of dry cowboy wit, they really connected with the gathering audience. Compared to other support acts I have seen on my Forty quest, they really were in the top 3 and I will be heading to download their music from iTunes very soon.

But it was not them I was here for sadly, it was the main act and around 30 minutes later, the lights dropped and accompanied by some old sentimental track that I really should have known, the boys took to the stage and there, in skinny jeans, a fine suit jacket with his hair looking like it was 1992 and bass round his hips was JC. We were off and the cathartic singalong began in earnest.

“Always the last to know”, “Kiss this thing goodbye”, The Ones that you love” and “Just like a man”. Bang, bang, bang, fucking bang. Perfect start, perfectly played, every word hit the spot, I sang my heart out and I meant every fucking word, every heart wrenching lyric. I swear Justin nodded at me at one stage and I really thought they had peaked too soon. How wrong.

Unlike Justin’s solo show, here was little banter, there was no need. The setlist was comprised of the “A-Z” of the bands history and there was plenty to go at. “What I think she sees”, “Not Where it’s at” and the mesmerising “Sleep instead of teardrops” all had the crowd spellbound – “Like everyone else will do, I’m gonna lie to you” sang Justin, we connected. Before we really joined in on “Be my downfall” –  “And as I look at you and I fall under your spell”… so many lines which were sung with gusto by all around.

“Food for songs” was accompanied by the drummer stood in front of his drum kit smashing the beat out and giving this song a real edge, before the heart breaking “Tell her this” was gently set flight into the Leeds cold night air. “In the frame” was next up before the classic “Nothing ever happens, Nothing happens at all, the needle returns to the start of the song and we all sing along like before”… And we did, it was just like before, but somehow it was better. It meant more, so much more.

“Roll to me” was swiftly followed by “Driving with the brakes on” – there is a killer line in that song, “Well I might be more a man, if I stopped this in its tracks and said come on, let’s go home”. It was a clear favourite on the night. “Hammering heart” was a very old song reworked for the “middle aged band” – that was their words, not mine – before “Spit in the rain”, a personal song from years gone by and she knows who she was.

But it was the next song that notched the gig up to new heights. “Being Somebody Else” is pure rock and roll and arguably one of the best songs the best songs the band has ever done, tonight it took flight and was incredible. “Drunk in a band” saw 3 of the band take turns on vocals, before they scuttled off stage.

They came back for 4 more songs, “Lucky guy”, “Here and Now”, “Just before you leave” hit individual heights before the show closed with “Jimmy Blue” a song from “Waking Hours” that had the whole of the crowd singing as one. It felt like Justin didn’t want to stop, he extended the song, he felt the crowd with him, but it had to end and it ended far too soon.

“Happy people don’t look at the time” was something my friend said to me recently and it proved to be true. I never once looked at the time, I never once took my eyes from the stage I was happy for that near 2 hours (ish). It truly was a superb gig and justified the boys reforming. It can only be hoped that they now find time to record a new CD and take this from nostalgia to something more.

All that was left for me was the cold night air, a parking ticket and a drive home. Back to reality, but god bless you Del Amitri, a night of better therapy I could not have had and if the stars line up, I may even see them again next week with young Ollie as we head to London for the weekend. However, Twitter will need to play a bit better on tickets as nearly £50 is expensive for a 12 year old!

So, if you are still here, still reading, you are bloody mad, but need rewarding. Here is Del Amitri from the night and “Driving with the brakes on”.

Click here to find more Del Amitri related posts on this blog!

Enjoy

“No, maybe I’ll just get drunk and it will all make sense”…

Jimmy Carr, Phil Jupitus, 2014, Moaning, Sambuca and Twitter…

So, a quick round up as to where I am at, where I have been and what I have seen. There has been so much happening, not sure where to start, so I will begin with Jimmy Carr.

“I would rather stick pins into my eyes that be in a room with Jimmy Carr” or words to that effect was the text I received on the day of the show. My Frenz Suzie was clearly quite restrained on her thoughts of the man. However, I was looking forward to it and the show was pretty much as expected.

If you can think of the most offensive way to spend an evening, joking about Sex, Race, Religion, you name it, Carr nailed it. It was wrong on so many levels, but I guess that is part of the attraction. Add into the mix attending with a couple of friends who are quite… prudish – it made for a fun night.

The show was mainly stand up one liners, but a lot of audience participation and he even got people up on stage at one point to act out a very rude sitcom script that he had written. Suffice to say, it won’t be aired on the BBC anytime soon! But it was a very funny night and I would really recommend if you get the chance to see him.

Not long after Jimmy, I found myself 3 rows away from Phil Jupitus. I was expecting another stand up show, however this was anything but. Split into 3 sections, Jupitus came on stage as 3 characters, with the premise of the show being that the audience asked questions and he made up stuff as he went.

Now, this was a brave idea, because clearly, a stand up show is well crafted and the jokes are honed to hit the spot – But ad hoc answers to random questions and make them funny – well they can be hit and miss. So it proved on the night – Jupitus is good, very good, but not everything had the audience rolling in the isles.

His first character was a dead actor, the second a dead U boat German and the 3rd a dead Phil Jupitus from the future. I was brave enough to ask 2 questions, for which we got entertaining answers – I asked the German if he had met Hitler and then asked Jupitus what happened to Simon Cowell in the future.

My next 2 “Forty for Forty” hit this week, as Ollie and I see Tom Odell in Leeds, before seeing Nina Conti on Thursday. There will then be a break before the long awaited trip to London for Nick Cave. Words cannot describe how much I am looking forward to that.

I have also added my first 2014 gig to the list. After failing to get Glastonbury tickets, Franz Ferdinand are now booked in for next year. I am really looking forward to seeing them – there is a link with Glastonbury there as I saw their debut at the festival on my first visit.

As I said, I failed on 2014 Glastonbury tickets and it appears to have triggered my 40 year old moaning side. I am moaning about a few things and this weekend, I found myself in Nottingham with a friend. Stop moaning – he said – and drink.

Now, I have not drunk alcohol for a long long time, for various reasons, but Saturday was a bit of a watershed. Or a blow-out. Or, well, however you want to see it. Cocktails, Vodka and more Sambuca shots than was good for me – one good friend says she may have died if drinking so many shots – it left me ill.

It was a contrasting feeling, because from what I can recall for the most part, I reconnected with why I used to love getting drunk. Had I stopped at a point in time on the night, it could have been memorable for different reasons. Sadly, the shots killed that thought.

I always was a lightweight drinker. I could never deny that fact. Vodka had a way of infecting me and leaving the night before in a blur. That’s not always a good thing, or perhaps it is / was. Perhaps it was more a defence mechanism. The intoxicated versions of ourselves seldom do us proud.

Sick, ill, feeling sorry for myself.  No better reason to moan really and even if it was self-inflicted, then I reserve the right to moan about it! And what better place to do that than Twitter. Such a strange place. Think it, Type it, Tweet it.

Although I am becoming bored of the medium, a bit like I did with Facebook. Whilst Facebook became mind-numbing, Twitter hasn’t reached that point just yet. It is great for keeping up to date with news, but the amount of trolls and spam is becoming a bore. Still, it helps with tickets and I should be thankful I suppose.

However, if you Tweet, feel free to leave your twitter name on the comment for a follow. Now, I don’t think this ramble can be classed as moaning – or is it? I wouldn’t know, you let it show. So, will leave you with this from Tom Odell.

Young Ollie has been playing him repeatedly, will do a full review when I find time, in the meantime, this is the beautiful and haunting “Sense”

Enjoy