“The feeling’s gone and I just can’t get it back”…

'dj

~

It used to be something…
But now it’s all gone…

Only echoes still remain…
Of what was so strong…

A fragment of a memory…
That stirs now and again…

Rising to the surface…
Quickly descending and then…

Becoming that feeling…
Of numbness, of nothing…

Like a man in the ground…
Buried cold in his coffin…

But reminding you that…
There once was a passion…

That would take a hold…
And leave you gasping…

Left you begging for more…
Got you so very high …

It was mixed with danger…
Toxic deception and lies…

Providing guilty pleasure…
The stuff of your dreams…

And it took you to places…
You never thought you’d see…

But what began as fantasy…
Then became something else…

It became dark and twisted…
It became bad for your health…

So you pushed it away…
Tried to lighten the load…

By blocking the demons…
And the visions they showed…

Yet despite all the heartache…
Some days you crave it so bad…

And wonder if it will ever…
Perhaps, maybe come back…

But until that moment…
There’s a void full of nothing…

An empty hole in the blackness…
That used to be something…

~

29 responses to ““The feeling’s gone and I just can’t get it back”…

  1. The words are how my heart feels now my x husband of 34 years died xmas after being put in a car left to die by his own children my heart aches for him we had become friends after our divorce he was a good human being an a alohlic yes but hurt no one but himself no one seems to care about what happened to him but me he was poor the kids reaped his insurance policies enriched left to just ignore him in death as they had in life now I’m in yet another deep hole since I’m sad he and our son are together yet I’m alive yet dead inside dying each day

  2. As always, our Master of Words..
    Imagery that stirs my soul and desires that I can’t leave behind..love this, as I love all of your work..
    Sending our love and wishing you a beautiful 2016, J…xxx

  3. I am so sorry you lost your child. I won’t pretend to understand your pain. I cannot fathom it. What I do know is that your words hold power. The way you choose them and piece them together holds power. Your story lives and breathes. It is alive.

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