“There are diamonds in her eyes”…

stock-footage-knife-dripping-blood

~

The bath is poured and ready…
The scented candles are all lit…
She slides in her naked body…
Going to make the most of it…

She’s left the door off the latch…
And dropped him a subtle text…
Hoping his attention she did catch…
Fantasizing about what happens next…

But his phone is switched off…
He’s on a night out with the boys…
Yet she hears a muffled cough…
And the closing door makes a noise…

She’s no longer home alone…
And she thinks it is her man…
Drifting deep into her sexual zone…
She thinks it’s all going to plan…

Yet the man inside her house…
Is just a thief with a knife…
And as quiet as a mouse…
He rummages through her life…

Stealthily gliding up the stairs…
He hears her teasing mating call…
And he is taken unawares…
But understands she has to fall…

He enters the steamed up bathroom…
Sees her naked body in the tub…
It will become her watery tomb…
But not before she makes him feel good…

She screams out in pure terror…
But she’s in no position to resist…
He puts the blade upon her…
Before forcing her to kiss…

Then drags her out of the bath…
Violently fucking her three times…
Before stabbing her with wrath…
And then fleeing from his crime…

The bath was poured and ready…
The scented candles perfumed the air…
Now lays her lifeless and naked body…
Her diamond eyes frozen with despair…

~

5 responses to ““There are diamonds in her eyes”…

  1. My eyes just kept widening while reading this! I love it so much, but there’s such a major, dark twist in it :O It was supposed to be such a lovely evening and then this thief shows up and it all turns out horribly…

    Oh why do I love the dark and twisted in this so much?! ^^

  2. I read “When the Moment Comes Alive” first – they are both dark but I prefer that ending to this one. I think I like that you had the perp perish instead of the innocent victim. Your writing draws the reader in. Clever to write two scenarios for the main piece!

  3. Ah, you replied before I had a chance to write and enter my second comment. Both are terrific, but I guess you can tell which I prefer. I think it’s such a clever idea to present both. Honestly, I was distracted by the second to last verse,

    “Then drags her out of the bath…
    Violently fucking her three times…
    Before stabbing her with wrath…
    And then fleeing from his crime…”

    my mind went wandering, wondering how he could fuck her three times? Rather rude of me, sorry. Then back on track and sadly picturing, “her diamond eyes frozen with despair”. Both versions are excellent. Sometimes it’s just good to see a potential victim prevail in such a violent manner, gives us all a bit of hope. Please know that I say all of this with a sense of humor! (I hope I didn’t horrify you.)

    Take care,
    Pepper

    • Thanks Pepper – It would take a lot to horrify me – I love seeing your thought process when reading my words – I suppose I never gave a time frame for the attack – so it’s open to the reader how long she was around for before being stabbed, but there is no saying this was all instantaneous – but there is of course poetic licence in all I write, after all, that’s the joy of writing dark fiction over fact right 😉 – Cheers J

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